Sometimes, in spite of all of your amazing feats of resiliency after getting knocked in the dirt, you don’t get to carry home the Comeback Kid trophy. Sometimes, you just can’t win.
I want to be sure to give myself plenty of credit. I have won many days and many battles. I have been knocked in the dirt, kicked when I was down, and spat in the face. I have picked myself up and continued to move forward. I survived, then I thrived. I helped others out of pits. I taught others how to thrive. I brought teams together and helped connect military healthcare with community partners and Veterans Affairs.
I had a good run, and I have no regrets. I am proud of myself and my service. There are some things I am looking forward to once I become a civilian again:
- Being able to wear colorful fingernail polish
- Being able to wear my hair in any configuration I want
- Being able to carry any color backpack
- Being able to wear any color and style earrings I want
- Being able to talk politics at work
- Being able to invite people at work to church
- Calling people by their first name
- Saying “yeah” or “okay” in place of “yes, sir/ma’am”
- Not being on a recall roster, deployment team, or response team
- Getting to take vacation and go wherever I want and not have to take leave on weekend days
- No PT test for “job security”
- Not having to wear a hat outside unless I want to
- Being able to use one of those clear umbrellas that you can see through so you can keep it low down to you
- No more “additional duties”
My military career is drawing to a close, but my life is taking off! I am far from finished helping teams do amazing things and teaching people to lead with excellence. I am still writing my book. I have worked as a civilian before, and as I return to civilian life, I bring with me the sum of my experiences. I am a survivor. I am a leader. I will thrive and lift others to higher heights because it matters. I am FAR from finished.
Sometimes, you think you’ve lost when it is not even close to over. Take a deep breath. Keep getting back up when you’re knocked down. Breathe. Accept the moment as is. Breathe. Talk to God and then LISTEN. Breathe. Start to gather yourself and build a game plan. Cry a little (or a lot) if you need to. Another nice, deep, cleansing breath, my friend…and then start to move. Move forward…it’s going to work out. We will win. Winning might not look like we imagined it would, but it will still be amazing!