On the occasion of his birthday (20 Sep), I wanted to share a few things with everyone about the greatest human being I have ever known. It has been almost 2 years since he passed away, and I miss him so much. As you all know, my birthday is tomorrow. My dad and I would celebrate our birthdays together since they were only a day apart. After I moved out of the house, he and my mom would always call me up on my birthday and sing the entire “Happy Birthday” song, complete with “keep coming back” at the end. I don’t think I can tell you about the last time he sang to me. It is still too painful a memory and I am not ready to share it.
Rholin Augustine Geheb was born in Arkadelphia, Arkansas on September 20, 1932. One of I think 9 children, son of a farmer. He told me of days he would go out to the pasture early in the morning, barefoot, burying his toes in a warm pile of cow manure, singing “Don’t Fence Me In”. He sang it occasionally when he was older, sans the cow manure. Now, that song somehow breaks my heart and makes me smile at the same time.
I was actually 13 when my mom and Ron got married. Furthermore, he adopted me when I was 18 as an adult consent adoption. I became a Geheb at 18 years of age. Yes, he was my step-dad. Honestly, the only regret I have is that I referred to him as “my dad” to everyone else, yet never called him Dad to his face. If I could go back, I would have called him Dad. He never actually had kids of his own, and I was an only child, so he got to experience all of my teenage angst right out of the gate. We had some moments, but nothing significant. He loved me just right, as his daughter.
He served in the Air Force, stationed at Tuley, Greenland as a heating technician. Back then, the Air Force would allow you to get a GED while you served, and that’s what he had to do. He was trained in his trade and later on, after a stint as a realtor and broker, he worked Ron’s Repair Service and utilized his Air Force training once again. After I graduated high school, I attended a community college for a year and then joined the Air Force myself as an Airman (one stripe). Ron was so proud. I was proud to follow in his footsteps in service to my country.
Along the way, I got married and had my first child, my parents’ first grandchild, Brandon. I’m just going to come out and say it…the unwritten rule is that grandparents aren’t supposed to play favorites, but hands down to the very end, Brandon was my dad’s favorite grandchild. Not being blood relation meant absolutely nothing. Brandon was his grandson from day one.
Let it be known before I go any further, that Ron was a man of God. No one who came in contact with him could deny that. My parents lived in Arizona, and my dad had to go to Iowa to attend a funeral of his brother’s wife. He stopped in St Louis and came over for a visit when we lived in Belleville. He got to meet Katelyn for the first time. She was still a little thing. He never did get to see her very big. He told Jeff that his flight was great because he got a middle seat. Most people would think that was horrible, but not my dad. He loved it because for the entire flight, he got to talk to not one, but TWO people about Jesus. That is the kind of man of God he was.
I was stationed in Colorado in Aurora before coming here to Turkey, and my parents intention was to visit us in Colorado. My dad never got to. His health had deteriorated too much by then. I did get to go out to Reno where they were staying at the time and see him one last time a few months before he passed. Thank you, Jeff, for talking me into going. To see him in such a physical state was a little hard to take, but I am so glad to have gotten to see him one last time.
My mom did make the trip and stayed with us the following summer. We laid my dad to rest in the Denver VA Cemetery. He would have loved the view from on top of that hill, overlooking a bit of the landscape, complete with a church steeple with a giant cross on top. We had “Praise the Lord” engraved on his tombstone. That’s what he said. That’s how he lived. Always in praise of Lord of Life.
I also wish he could have come to Turkey to visit. I never even got to tell him I was going to come here. He would have been so excited. He would have loved to see the seven churches, Tarsus, the Mediterranean Sea. All I want to do is sit here at home and shut myself off from the world because it is all too different to me. He could have talked me out of that. He was always the one I went to when I was “stuck”.
You can’t begin to know how difficult this all was to type. The memories are all so bittersweet. The loss gets relived with each word. Yet, I know where he resides nowadays. People say, “Well, he/she is smiling down on you from heaven.” I apologize to everyone who draws comfort from such visions of their heavenly loved ones, but that is not true. The Bible says they are feasting and worshiping the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords in that heavenly location. And trust me, it is a good time. But, if he could “look down on me”, I would hope that he is still proud of me and aware of how much he is missed and loved. If he were still with us here on earth, I would say, “Happy Birthday, Dad. I love you so much I can’t stand it!”
